The Most Wonderful Time of the Year? open

"Why do you get nightmares?" I asked.

".... when i was a kid, my dad would get very strict with his disciplin when i was not acting perfectly..." i said quietly, my voice shaking slightly as i remembered the Terror "i almost died on several occasions"

"He scolded you for not being perfect? Thats ridiculous...and sick... Was your father ill or something to believe that?"

"alot of rich people's families are like this, everything is built on how you carry yourself... im sure youve seen how easily i switch from how i am usually, laid back and carefree, and when it comes to serious matters, i slip into my... pompous me... where i go and have a stiff but fluid posture, and have a commanding air about me? my family is one of the top families in the world, and as such, the higher you go, the tougher things get on you as a kid... i didnt even get a childhood sadly enough..." i said with a slight sigh

I picked at the label on the bottle. " Up until I was around 8, I think, was when it really started to overwhelm me, my empathy. Before then, I didnt even notice it, since, well, if a childs annoyed he will show it, if a childs happy, he will show it, and so on. Nobody hid anything. Or so I thought. My dad took me to a really nice park once. He dressed me in a little green, flouncy dress, with white tights and black dress shoes, and tied my hair back with a green ribbon. He dressed up all fancy too. I was puzzled at first, but when we got to the park I noticed the few people there where dressed up too. Well, with me being me I ran around like a puppy on caffiene. There werent any places for children to play, so I just ran until I got myself lost. I didnt care, until I ran into a man and his son, who was around my age. The boy looked really surprised, probably because my ribbon was falling out, my hair was a natural disaster and my dress and tights were covered in grass stains, and he was just so... clean and neat, and it felt like it had never occured to him to play to such an extent he'd end up covered in grass stains, all messy as well. The man... scared me. His voice and face were so calm, yet I felt heaps of disgust directed to me, as well as scorn and disdain, while the boy felt...fear, I think? My dad found me while the man was sort of lecturing me about how a young lady was supposed to act. Then he looked at me dad, and the emotion changed to... something like disappointment, saying that I wasnt being raised properly, but he could tell why. His emotion changed to a mocking one, all high and mighty, while my dad felt very humiliated. It made me so angry, but I was only 8, what the hell can I do? After that incident, I started to notice that when people bullied me, they felt superior than me, something I never noticed before. No matter how much I fought or tried to, they always had that tiny yet very painful emotion. You...sometimes have that emotion, though its faint. Its very unintentional, but it bothered me at times. Those were the times id lash out instead of ignoring you unless necessary. I mean, not the only reason, but one."

"i remember, you looked quite cute in that dress, first time i thought a girl was cute... it astounds me to find out your the first girl ive met that was interesting to me... father wasnt very pleased with yours that day, and in order to make sure such a thing wouldnt happen, i got even more strict in his lessons.... the place you went to was a park that was nearby my fathers residence, his summer home, and as such, when people got to close to the property, he would either send me or both of us would go see who it was in order to make sure it wasnt a family coming to meet us for buisness... i must say, im quite glad i met you that day, as my father was bringing girls from other rich families that day, and when you showed up, it was almost as though you woke me up from my rich boy additude that i was trained into.... the girls werent as interesting to me as you were at the time.... i dont remember much from then, only that the only thing that mattered to me was my studies and my fathers approval... thats why i was so surprised, you were like a shellshock, as i had been sheltered from girls that werent from proper families my father approved of... its gotten to the point that with my sister dead, my brother in a medical coma and having cancer, and my father growing old, hes allowed me certain privilages in return that when i finally do graduate, and find a girl wuitible to marry for my own needs, that i will go and take control of the family buisness until an Heir of my own is born... doubt ill find a girl though, rich girls dont interest me, as they are in it for their families or their own needs, and normal girls dont like me for the fact that my rich heiritage shows in my posture and speach, or they try and use me for money... its a big fear of mine, that i wont find anyone to partner with..." i said, my mood falling as i brought up the arrangement "but in the event i hit age 26 without finding one, ill give up searching and take over the buisness like i promised, and probobly go through with an arranged marrige..." i said simply "my father forced me to promise to make sure that the girl could at least control herself around people, and had to be special..." i said, turning to look at her "and honestly, not really worth hiding it at this point, no other girls have the spark you have... you have looks, your special in the empathy.... your nice when it is needed, and strict when not... and no, im not asking you to marry me, im not forcing you to do anything, id rather be alone than force anything you dont want on you and your father..." i said, being very repulsed at the very idea of doing so

I chuckled. "Sure felt like you were asking me, then you retracted your offer. I wouldve said no, regardless. Rather sudden offer. And im not sure if your dad would remember me as the little grass stained girl that was rather hard to handle, or if he'd like me... and I dont act too well when im not liked because the more they try to hide it, the stronger it feels..."

"as i said, my father is getting older, to the point he doesnt even remember my name most of the time.... and im not stupid, if i was going to propose to you, id have to get closer to you, get to know you, get you to like me, and then make the moment special..." i said with a light laugh "even if this someday does happen, if they hear that i chose you, nobody would want to consider showing anything ill toward you, if anything people would try to hard to get on your good side... im tempted to just hire someone to manage the buisness, and let me free to not have to deal with stuck up meetings and the like, and do what i enjoy..." i said simply, waving my hand "so when an emotion is hidden, it amplifies it?" i asked curiously

"Depending how much they try to hide it. When they show what they feel, it doesn't register very strongly, yet hiding the emotion amplifies it... I dont really get it myself, being an empath is really confusing..."

"so, if im sad, but try and hide it, it registers more? that does seem rather confusing..."

"Yes...I suppose it would be easier to say you cant hide your emotions from an empath..."

"good to know.... honestly, it is kinda scary...." i said with a smile

"How do you think I feel about it, Huma?" I asked, putting the beer down resting my head on my hands.

"i dont know, your always so strong, i cant get close enough to figure that out... but i think if it were me, it would terrify me to the point i wouldnt leave my house...."

"It doesnt really become burdensome until later in your life," I shrugged. "Most of my relatives on my dads side are very... honest. Brutally honest, since they cant really hide anything from eachother. When we do all get together, its utter madness," I chuckled in spite of myself.

"seems like it would be nice for a change compaired to the paranoia and secrecy of my family... speaking of which, i wont be here for awhile, i have to go to my sisters funeral... probobly alone, as no one in my family other than our mother liked her, and mom passed away last year as well...." i said simply, my emotions drained on the subject, having cried for what seemed like forever over the last few days, and looked over at her tiredly "i hope your house is finished being repaired?" i asked, trying to reach a more positive note now, my voice almost convincing myself and sighed, giving up on it "course it is, they sent me the photos and bill this morning..."

"...I could accompany you, as long as you dont mind me being drunk, since that seems like the only way to keep... my rudeness at bay," I said, after noting how he tried to cheer himself up. I hoped it didnt back fire...

"please, ill probobly be more drunk than you are to keep myself from killing myself... shes getting burried next to mom... i havent gone there since she died..." i muttered, looking at her "and it would probobly be better for you to be drunk, so you dont get totally overwhelmed with emotions you might sense..." i said honestly, and stopped for a moment "you dont have to... even if your dad says you should, you dont have to come with me, i can guess your feelings toward me, even not being an empath..." i said, pulling a bottle of wine from the fridge after getting up, and going back to my chair "i would rather not force you to feel anything, and if you did come, id try and have some pride and not show it... that would amplify it, and it wouldnt be a plesent thing for you to experiance, considering how badly ive been reacting so far... it got the the point that i cant sleep in my room anymore because of all the damage ive done there..." i said quietly, taking a sip from the bottle, and looked at the ground "in all honesty, given what little i do know about you, youd probobly be better just leaving me to go solo to this, and then after i cry myself out, then you come and get me or send your dad or something if your planning on doing this... there were only 2 people who i would let see me cry..." i said simply, my voice cold now as i looked out the window were it was nice and sun and my eyes started to glare at it, doing my best not to cry, and sniffled a little bit ".... at this point, we are to drunk to send you home, and im not staying anywhere near my room anymore, you can stay in my sisters room again, and ill stay in here.... we should eat the food you brought before it gets cold..." i said simply, sniffling again, hoping that it would distract me from what i was feeling

My plan backfired... I sighed. I didnt really know what to say at this point, so I just agreed silently, though I wondered what his room looked like.

".... do you really wanna come with me?" i asked after a moment, looking at her "just you wanting this? not your dad?" i asked a little hopefully, noting the sigh she gave off, and tried to keep my emotions level and not get my hopes up to much

"I just learned about the funeral, how would my dad have a say in this? Our brains arent linked..."

".... good point, sorry, im a little messed right now... ill let you decide when you want to go, its on the 2nd of January... at 4 PM..." i said, checking my phone tiredly "at the graveyard over near the old folks home...." i said with a yawn, seriously wondering why she was offering to help, momentarily forgetting why we were here...

"...These arent really things you can cope with entirely on your own," I said suddenly, "You need some support, or else you end up..,mostly wasting away, neglecting stuff." You know, like my dad. And he hasnt even fully recovered yet... I sighed. Who was I kidding? I was barely moral support for my dad, and I was going to try to be moral support for a guy I partially disliked?

".... has your old man started moderation with his drinking yet? i could have sworn that we made a promise, that if he moderates and gets it togeather, i wont give up on you..." i said quietly after a moment of silence "i get what your saying, i really do, but even i can tell your doubting this right now..."

"Slightly. He tries. I do too, but im not very good support for him..."